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Friends, this world is difficult. But Jesus asks us to pick up our cross and follow him. Sometimes in this world, we get scared that because of the fear that in all the hardships and sufferings in life, we may abandon the cross.
Someone recently told me they were full of fear, anxiety, shame, and even sadness. At the root of those emotions was anger. When we identified that anger, I asked, “Did you tell God you were angry?”
You should have seen the look that person gave me!!!
I continued – Don’t be afraid to tell God you are upset with God. The Church is built for screaming. Our prayers can be full of anger and frustrations we bring to God.
In suffering, even Jesus cried out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” When we suffer the most … it is good to cry out to God.
The one we pray to understand us — because he lived a human life. It was a life filled with suffering. God chose to bring us closer to him through his suffering.
Maybe we don’t realize that suffering. Maybe, living in a mostly protestant community, we fail to realize the sacrifice of this Friday. Instead of seeing the sacrifice of Christ on the cross we only see the promise of empty cross.
To realize that sacrifice, I want to use an exercise from Spiritual Direction called imaginative prayer. Take a moment to remove yourself from everything around you. Focus here before the altar on the crucified Christ. Gaze upon our suffering Lord and savior hanging on the cross. Experience all he experienced. Know Jesus crucified and suffering. Put yourself there on the hill of Golgotha.
Feel the hot air, smell the sweat of bodies, taste the metallic irony mist of blood blown about you by the hot dry wind.
You see this man Jesus stumbling and falling as he walks up the hill to be crucified. It is easy to tell he has been tortured by his captors. They have a crown of thorns on his head, blood and sweat runs into his eyes. You can now feel the stinging of the sweat and blood in your own eyes. Blood has soaked his clothes. You can see the marks of whip on his beaten body through the tatters of clothes they have left him in.
Do you feel his suffering? Does your heart ache for this innocent man?
He reaches the top of the hill and the soldiers push him to the ground. His body hits the hard dusty earth and rock. His head bangs against the cross thrown upon the ground. THis executioners pulled and rip the garments off his body. Tearing the skin and ripping the scabbing drying blood so that his wounds bleed anew.. The soldiers laugh. His accusers smile in conspiracy. They point and whisper.
The soldiers take their hammers and long metal spikes to nail the Son of God to the beam of wood.
Where is your heart at this moment? Are there tears in your eyes? Do you feel his pain?
Then his arms are spread wide. Large hard metal spikes are pounded into his hands. Hands that fed the hungry. Hands that healed the sick, touched the outcasts. Those wonderful healing hands were violently pierced by the nails and smashed by blows from the hammer that drove those nails. Those beaten and defiled hands are the hands of God that touch the world.
Look to his hands and look at yours. Do you see the nail holes? Would you take his place?
Then they poured on more anguish as the nails were pounded into his feet. The feet that took the same first steps we all took after a loving mother. The feet that walked the land of Galilee. Feet that carried him into the water of a baptism by John the Baptist. The feet that walked on the water. The feet carried Jesus to those in need. Feet that lead the world on a path to salvation. These pierced and broken feet were the feet of God that walked this world.
Then they lifted Him up on that wooden pole and dropped it into a hole in the ground bringing more jarring pain to an already suffering victim. Jesus whose life was love, compassion, healing, grace, peace, and miracles; hangs on the cross.
Jesus speaks his first words, forgiveness - “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.” In his suffering He forgives these people. Jesus said that they did not know what they were doing.
Would your heart still be that open? Would you have love and compassion if you were in Jesus’ place?
Between his nail pierced hands and feet was the ravage body of our savior. His head was abused by blows and strikes, pierced by thorns. The blood of our salvation pours down his face. A face, a visage that is a complete and total expression of love. A face full of compassion, love, and understanding. A face full of grace. The human face of God.
His body was scourged and flailed by a whip which had its thong and bolsters studded in metal balls, spikes, and bones. These multiplied the pain and damage of each strike. Splinters driven deep into the skin of his shoulders and back from carrying the cross. His body bruised greatly from the abuse. Ribs broken fram the beating caused him to struggle for each breath of air. He was barely able to breathe.
Do your feel his pain? Do you know his agony? Do you weep for him?
The ones who followed him and said that they loved him had mostly run away. Now those nearest to him mocked him, cursed him, hurled insults, and spat upon him.
Those hard nails fastening his legs and feet in place. He hung there beaten, tortured, and dying. The weight of his body and his wounds made it hard to breath. Yet, Jesus did not hang in silence. Push up on the nails driven through his feet to capture enough air in his lungs to speak,he cried out in his suffering.
“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”
Do you find it hard to breathe? Is your heart aching? Do you feel the pangs that Jesus felt? Are you crying? Is your heart breaking? Do you understand that God knows the pangs of suffering?
Friends, come back now.
It is ok for our hearts to hurt for all that he suffered for us. There is suffering in this world that we must face. In those times of suffering and anguish. It is alright to be angry with God. Bring your troubles to him, cry out to him.
Jesus did. He did it for us.
Praise be Jesus Christ forever and ever. Amen.
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